So I just finished the novel today, and let me tell you this. It was such an emotional and touching novel mainly because I found myself relating to some of the circumstances that the main character, Clay, was in. From when he was afraid to approach the girl he liked because of what he has heard about her (it’s kind of messed up really) to his walk through the night of the neighborhood he was in, I can say that I have done similar things. Thankfully, I didn’t have to experience what he was going through, having to listen to the tapes of the girl that committed suicide, of the girl that he liked. He definitely reflects on what he has done and brings up the possibilities that could’ve have happened if he had just done something different. And reading these parts makes me remember the times where I would ask myself, “what if?” I’m a believer of the parallel universes and how in some other universe, things are way different than they are in this one. Now to get back on track, this novel has given me a different meaning and perspective of suicide. To start off, it is such a horrible thing to know that someone in this world feels alone and lost even though they have tried seeking help from others. It makes me sad knowing they have tried everything they possibly can, with the knowledge they have. I say “with the knowledge they have” because in this world, for most of us anyways, someone out there loves us enough to the point where they’d die for us (that’s excluding any family members), and what sucks is that we don’t even know this type of person exists because they choose to keep their feelings to themselves. With Hannah’s case, all she had to do was tell Clay how she felt and she might have lived. But of course, she couldn’t, she was already weakened and saw the world as a bad place. She’s been done wrong many times in the past and it was almost impossible for her to trust anyone anymore. My girlfriend has a similar problem. She can’t trust people because she’s been done wrong in the past, and I understand. On the other hand, there’s me throwing trust at everyone because thankfully no one has done me wrong… or maybe to me, it appears no one has done me wrong. All I can say is that this book gives you a different perspective of suicide. I think I know now what some people need… to know that someone in this world cares for them, not just hitting them up to hang out or providing little bits of advice, but someone that actually cares. I’m going to try my best to be that someone.